So, since the beginning of the year, I have been working on QuestBridge. I was selected as a finalist, so I had to complete the supplementary materials this past Monday - and am happily done!
But now, I have to focus on all my other schools. I think if I put forth an hour a week until Dec. 1st, I’ll be good - 2 of the apps I KNOW about are due then. And I say know about because right before I began writing this, I decided to figure out what colleges I was applying to and narrow them down to, oh I don’t know, 10? 15? Well…
Trinity U
A&M
UT
Baylor
UH
HBU
—-
NYU
Emerson?
UCLA
UCB
BU
BC
U of Philly
Colby
Bates
Brandeis
U of Rochester
Carnegie Mellon?
Colby-Sawyer?
Emory
Grinnell
Swarthmore
U of Maine
U of Maine @ Farmington
Vanderbilt
Whittier
U of Denver
Colorado
—–
Bowdoin
UPenn
Rice
Northwestern
Trinity C CT
Wesleyan CT
Vassar
Amherst
that’s a bit more. The first set are in TX (where I am from), the second are just random, and the last have already been applied to through QuestBridge. Just for those 8 schools, I spent $369. I think I have to narrow done my list. No matter what, with or without an app fee, it’s going to cost at least $25/school because of SAC/ACT scores and transcripts.
The truth is, though, I don’t want to narrow it done. I want to add on. I know that is quite horrible, but I can’t help feeling that I may not apply to the one school that I do belong at, screwing me over forever. I want to apply everywhere to ensure that I will love where I get to go. Sigh… Anybody else feel like this?
Of course, I do have a top pick - Bowdoin -but it’s very much a reach school & i’ve never even visited. I will most likely end up at Baylor, but I don’t want to go there. Maybe it’s the dooming feeling I get when thinking of my chances at better schools that causes me to want to go everywhere.
I know I will get in to all my TX schools. I’m pretty sure I won’t get in to any of my QuestBridge schools. The rest are up for grabs.
But… I keep on staring at Columbia. And Yale. Princeton. Harvard. Stanford. I think I die a little each time. (Forget that the last statement is a hyperbole and go with me on this.) I want to go somewhere fabulous! And exciting! And amazing! And where Rory Gilmore went. Haha. But I am not even bothering to apply for 2 reasons: 1. I am not going to take the SAT Subject tests. Not only will I do horribly, I am sick of stress. 2. I won’t get in. Which is pretty much why I don’t try for #1. (And yes I know not all require the test, but #2 is still in play.)
Maybe I am freaking out because I made the wrong decision when choosing a high school and don’t want to do the same thing again. Here’s a little story I tell: I chose school X instead of Y because Y was too hard. It will be easier at X, and I will be at the top of my class. (Later on…) I scored lower on my SATs because I went to school X, where they concentrate on TAKS (Texas mandated test) instead of college acceptance. I won’t be as prepared for college because, at school X, we can convince the teachers of later due dates, they see my name at the top of the page and give me an A, and I’m not really being challenged.
Yes, I know it was not school X’s fault entirely. I could have picked up a SAT Vocab book, read textbooks on my own, studied without teachers, but I felt as if I didn’t have any incentive to do so, and I screwed up. I don’t want to screw up again. I just don’t.
appellative 6:45 pm on November 5, 2009 Permalink |
mia, i think you’re psyching yourself out!
I know it’s hard, i personally get into college slumps like every other day, but i think a more positive attitude is key. From what i saw - you’re a solid candidate! You can’t doubt every single decision you make.. you have to take the plunge and make the best of it! (Definitely easier said than done.)
What I think you should do though, and you seem to know you should do this too, is narrow down this list. Don’t add another school. Applying to all those schools really isn’t worth your time or money, because there’s no way they’re ALL places you could see YOURSELF (ahem, not rory gilmore) at. And if they are, then you need to be more selective. THAT’S how you’re going to find your fabulous schools (Like Bowdoin :D) Do this for the sake of your sanity.
Have you ever made a list of what you want in a college? Do you know what you want to major in? That’s the best way to start, I think. How about size? Location? Things like that can make it easy to chop some off the list. Heck maybe even take one of those saved application fees and buy a college review book if you don’t have one (collegeprowler is my personal favorite). If the pros aren’t outweighing the cons.. chop chop. That’s how I narrowed my list down from 10 to 15. (And I thought 15 was a lot… :P)
One more thing. What really helped me shorten my list was I got an excel document and listed all of the schools I wanted to apply to (Reach, Range, Safety, my interested level on a scale of 1-3, the location, EA/ED/Regular, whether you’ve visited or not, essays, testing requirements.. you can make it whatever you want). Seeing it all laid out was great, like when I saw a reach I had with a low interest level. I thought to myself, “why am I even applying here?”
Sorry this response was so long, I just really felt the need to say something.
Don’t doubt yourself.